Epilogue

Flying above the green, brown, blue terrain and white marshmallow clouds inspires me to write. I find it to be one of the most serene settings – no talking, no music, and no noise, except for the air rushing by outside and the occasional incoherent murmurings from the cockpit. I am on another plane, within the US this time, and I’m finally writing the conclusion to my India 2011 trip. I’ve been home for about a month now and have had some time to reflect on my time in Mumbai.

I didn’t get a picture of Chevy Rickshaw. We saw it practically every day for the first 2 weeks, but it eluded us the final 2 weeks. I had my camera ready just in case one of us – Lisa, Hussain (our driver), or I – caught a glimpse of it as we passed the energetic street. That street contained Lisa’s cows on the corner, “bath time” where we usually saw men showering near a water pipe, “water time” with young women carrying water pots and bowls precariously atop their heads while crossing the busy street, and “Chevy Rickshaw” - the rickshaw with the bright red top and Chevrolet symbol in the back window. We left India a week before 2 of our co-workers who had to stay behind at the last minute. I gave them a detailed overview of Chevy Rickshaw and even instructed them to take a picture if they saw it. It feels like it was just a legend now that I will tell my children. Maybe they will travel to India one day in search of Chevy Rickshaw like the Spaniards looking for the Fountain of Youth.

Besides looking for Chevy Rickshaw, we spent our last day in Mumbai looking for as many OMs as possible, as well as “Elizabeth” and Lisa’s last name. I knew finding my name would be highly unlikely, but my eyes perked up whenever we passed a church or other Christian area. In India, as in many other countries, names have meaning and tell you a lot about the person before even meeting them. For example, if you see the name Shiva or Ganesh, then you can assume that the bearer is Hindu. If you see the name Akil, Hussain, Ahmed, then you can assume that they are Muslim. If the name is Mary, Xavier, or Elizabeth, then they are likely to be Christian. These are all assumptions because families can choose whatever they’d like to name their children. However, most stick with tradition. A Hindu friend told me he would like to name his daughter Elizabeth, but his family would be very upset if he chose a Christian name for his child. The names, especially last names, can also tell you where the family is from. For example, Shah and Patel are popular names in Gujarat. Singh, as in Prime Minister Manmohan Singh, is a common last names for Sikhs. Khan is a common Muslim last name, and is the moniker for a couple of Bollywood’s biggest stars. I like the fact that everyone recognizes that names are important in India and that your name tells your story. It is a truth that many Americans tend to ignore.

Many things changed since my last trip to Mumbai in 2008. I attended Sushama’s baby shower, and now her “baby” is a 3-year old girl. My friends, Anita and Yagnesh, now have a toddler son too. I wasn’t able to see either of the children due to the limited amount of free time outside of work, but I heard a lot about them. Other people that I met before have moved on to do other things, but we’ve been able to keep in touch via social networking. Once again, my Indian friends and co-workers were gracious hosts and made my time in India easier and more fulfilling. From zipping across Vashi to the tailor on the back of Sarika’s motorcycle to the meals ordered from Sunny’s just before the 1am delivery cutoff by Wilfred, from Rupali wrapping my sari around my jeans and t-shirt to Chinmayee adorning my hand with mehinde, I was blessed to be surrounded by many people who were always willing to make my time in Mumbai the best possible under sometimes difficult circumstances.


Mehinde (henna) - I chose a more Arabian looking design this time.




OM

Somebody's watching me...

My experience in India is very different this time around. Last week, I worked nearly 100 hours and had very little time to do anything but sleep and grab food on the way back to work. Things are finally starting to calm down a bit. Also, my work schedule has changed so that I work most hours on the same day, instead of going to work during the afternoon of one day and leaving in the early morning of another day. I'm splitting my time between the Indian day shift and US day shift now, so I'm usually asleep by the time my friends and family get off work around 5pm. But I wake up hours before them to start working again.

I've taken a lot of fascinating pictures from the car rides to and from work, but I'm ready to get out and see the city in daylight now. I share a car with my co-worker for transport to work. She and I have found little things to make the long rides more tolerable. There's a certain point where she always looks for 3 cows that hang out together on a corner. Those cows played Holi a couple of weeks ago, because they still have colors on their horns and backs. Along that same road, I always look for my "Chevy Rickshaw" and she tries to help me get a picture of it. This elusive rickshaw stands out from all others because it has a bright red top and a Chevrolet symbol on the back window. I have to take a picture in it before I leave. Also, when we leave the office in the dark, we usually see trucks full of "flying chickens". The trucks have chicken cages on the back, and every time they hit a bump, you see the chickens bounce into the air. The same trucks are always empty when we see them during the daytime, and we know they've gone on to "Chicken Heaven". That sight makes my co-worker not want to eat the chicken sandwich we sometimes take for lunch, but it doesn't stop me. We also pass a busy truck stop at night that takes over the highway. I don't know what their capacity is, but trucks fill the inside of this station, and those that can't fit inside then park in the 2-3 lanes outside the truck stop along the highway. Just imagine passing a Flying J or Love's truck stop on I-20, and all the trucks are parked on the highway all night forcing the cars to only use 1 lane. The traffic is even worse when the trucks start to move again in the early morning to start their deliveries. They all seem to try to leave at the same time, forcing themselves on the road carrying heavy loads with workers sitting on top or inside the trucks in precarious positions.

Since I've been here, people have asked me if I am Nigerian, Ugandan, South African, and Ghanaian. Someone also called me Bob Marley (who happens to be very popular here) because of my hair. They are all surprised when I tell them I am American. They look at me in disbelief. I met another black woman at the hotel within my first couple of days in town. I was excited to see her and to actually have a conversation, especially after my experience the last time I was in India. She's a flight attendant from NY who usually stays at my hotel when they land here. We exchanged contact info. I also met a Swedish photographer at breakfast one morning over beet juice. We both sampled the hotel's fresh beet juice and agreed that we'd rather eat the beets than drink that concoction ever again. He was only in Mumbai for a day as part of a 12-day global photo shoot. He was heading to Dubai next. Check out his work. www.jacobfellander.com

The office is located near several malls. We walked over to the food court on the first day to pick up lunch, and I mentioned that there wasn't as much staring as my previous trip. No sooner had I said that, we walked in to the mall and all eyes turned in my direction. We went upstairs to the food court, and even the cooks stepped out of the kitchen to get a better view. The restaurant that we chose had a small window between the kitchen and the area with the counter and register. All I could see was a bunch of heads trying to look through that tiny window as I ordered. We had to wait a few minutes for them to get back to work and make the food, so everyone sitting in the food court turned towards us and watched us like we were animals on display at the zoo. It has been like that every day since. It doesn't happen as much at the hotel and the office. However, when we changed shifts and started working earlier in the Indian day, a new group of people had to get accustomed to seeing me in the office every day before they stopped staring as much. The people who ogle me out in public spaces seem to have no shame. They are not subtle stares either. They look at me as though I have three heads, 5 arms, and I breathe fire. I've started staring back at them. Most people turn their heads when they see me looking at them the way they look at me, but some just don't seem to get it. I saw a man and his children out yesterday. The children didn't pay much attention to me, but he looked at me for about 5 minutes straight, practically ignoring what they were doing. I went up the escalator, and his eyes were still fixed on me. I turned around and looked at him while I rode up. He adverted his eyes briefly. I stepped off, looked back down, and his neck was still craned to see me. Seriously? I need to start charging people a fee.

Truck stop during the day

"I see you!"

Empty chicken truck :-(

See the baby sleeping on the front?

Game Time...

I received "Alerts" before I even arrived in Mumbai about the possible threats to security during the Cricket World Cup taking place from mid March to April . Cricket is to India as football (not soccer) is to America. On a drive to the office around 2pm last Thursday, our driver had the radio tuned to the India vs. Australia match. Later that night, I saw many people looking at their phones constantly. Someone leaned over and told me they were checking out the score for the match. A little later, probably around 10pm (yes, it lasts as long as some work shifts), I heard a loud noise coming from the hallway as I sat at my desk. A few minutes later, I heard cheers. It sounded like a mob had assembled. I walked out into the reception area, and couldn't see past the crowd. Everyone stood there looking up at a tv that was affixed to the wall as the final moments of the game were played out. I went back to my desk. I heard several more shouts and finally a huge applause and screams, and knew that India must have won the game. After winning that match, India's next opponent would be Pakistan.

On my drive to work this morning, I asked my driver about the big match, and he said there would be no traffic this afternoon because of it. I walked into the canteen at work and saw that they were setting up a screen and rearranging the tables and chairs. It took me a second to realize that they were doing that for the match. India playing Pakistan is a really big deal, not just because of the athleticism involved, but also because of the historical and political meaning. I'm sure I'll be able to keep up with the game just based on the cheers and groans I hear coming from the canteen. It started at 2:30pm and will probably end after I leave the office at 10:30pm. The semifinals will take place in Mumbai on April 2. I don't think I would enjoy the game or being in the crowd, but I guess I would like to go just to say that I did it.

ICC Cricket World Cup 2011 http://www.cricketworld.com/cricket-world-cup-2011/

Time Has Come Today...

I haven't had much time for blogging since I've been here, although I've had many things that I wanted to share. I am in Mumbai for a payroll system implementation for my client, and we're going live today, finally. I think I spent more nights in hotel beds in 2010 than I did in my own bed because of this project. My experience in India is a little different this time around because I'm working much longer hours on an inconsistent schedule and sleeping when I can. Sleep is priceless and is only rivaled by food, which is a major thing if you know how I feel about food. I work all night and sleep during the day. India Standard Time (IST) is 10.5 hours ahead of Central Standard Time (CST). Please keep that in mind when calling me. Thank you.

Time Zone Converter http://www.timezoneconverter.com/cgi-bin/tzc.tzc

I'm leaving on a jet plane...

I left home around midday for the airport after zipping up my last bag that morning. I took my first malaria pill the night before I left, because I thought it would be easier to remember to take them after work each morning once I arrived in Mumbai. I waited at the airport for a couple of hours eating and reading before boarding the plane. I didn't realize until I was sitting comfortably on the plane in my window seat looking back at the wing that I'd forgotten my adaptors to plug my electronics. I guess that's what happens when you procrastinate. I watched "The King's Speech" on the flight to Newark and was very pleased. As the plane started to descend, I looked across the river to my favorite city basking in the beautiful sunset. I saw the tip of the Empire State Building and knew immediately that it would be green as soon as the sun went down for St. Patrick's Day. I went to a shop at Newark airport once we landed to find adaptors, and I saw a pack that seemed to cover the entire earth and was pretty expensive at $45. I decided to just wait until Mumbai to buy them.

The nearly 16-hour flight to Mumbai was pretty smooth. I watched "Black Swan", which probably raised a few eyebrows around me, as well as a few episodes of "The Tudors". I slept for about 5 hours in the relatively comfortable, self-contained, flat bed seats. They are made in a way that the person in front or behind you never intrudes on your space. I wish I could fly in those seats all the time. Once we landed and went through customs, it seemed to take an hour for my bags to come out. I walked out of the airport that night and saw a dramatic difference from my last trip. There were still lots of people waiting outside, but they were now on a sidewalk instead of a dirt road. I saw the hotel driver almost immediately. The ride to the hotel brought back many memories of rickshaws, loud noise, good and bad smells, and traffic.

I was very pleased with the hotel and my room. After showering, I ordered room service and began unpacking. I stayed up for several hours and finally went to sleep around 2am IST. I was awakened around 7am by a phone call. I got out of bed, ate breakfast, walked around the hotel, and went back to my room. I decided to take a short nap, but I ended up sleeping until about 6pm when another call awakened me. I met my co-workers for dinner at a restaurant in the hotel. I was so hungry, because I'd slept all day and hadn't eaten lunch. We made plans to go out the next day to tour the city and forego the Holi festivities at the hotel.

Kids playing Holi

Home at Last

I started writing this blog over 2 months ago. My purpose was to document my travels so that 1) family and friends could share in my experience 2) I could look back and relive the trip in my own words forever (or until blogger deletes it) and 3) when another single black woman travels to India or any other country, she has a personal reference beyond what is found in guidebooks.

The blog was not an original idea. I was inspired to share my story by 3 people. A few years ago, my friend Kherri interned in the UK and wrote a newsletter about her life there for the people at home. I found the newsletter idea to be very creative and informative. Last year, Clarence traveled across Europe for several weeks and wrote a travel journal under a nom de plume. I thought that added touch made it even more appealing; it was like reading the start of a novel. I didn’t want to write under a pseudonym, but I did want to have a creative headline. Credit goes to Chibuke for coming up with the fitting title, “Eclectic Soul”. Finally, I was inspired by Megan Lyles, a woman I only talked to online once a long time ago. She wrote a travel blog about her trip from New York to South America by bus http://www.meganlyles.com/. It is informative, funny, and inspiring, and I recommend that everyone read at least a few entries if they want to travel to a new place without actually leaving their seat.

People keep asking what I enjoyed the most about India. It was definitely the people I worked with. They were so thoughtful. They did their best to make my time memorable and enjoyable. Moumita and her roommate, Sarika and her mother, and Anita and her husband opened their homes to me and I was able to see how real Indians lived. Their hospitality was immeasurable. Sushama invited me to her baby shower so I could see a formal celebration. I was also invited to Rupali's sister's wedding but it is the week after I return to the States. Alkesh and Jitesh planned a full day of Mumbai site seeing for me along with Rupali, Prasanna, Jaya, Sarika, and Febin. Jaya and Shiva showed me the Vashi train station, and Trunal and Moumita made my last day in Mumbai unforgettable riding the local train. I would have been miserable without all of them. They served as my translators and my tour guides, my colleagues and my friends.

A few months ago, I was inspired by a song on a commercial called “Unwritten”. Today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten. I made a list of what I wanted my book to read and it included traveling to new and exotic places. I am grateful that I had the opportunity to travel to India. I’m looking forward to my next journey around the world. Where am I going next? Here’s a clue: I named my car after the city. For those of you who don’t know my car’s name, read some of my earlier posts. : )

Thanks to those who were regular readers and sent me feedback on my writing. Stay tuned for the next installment. I’ve posted my pictures of India. Please send me your email address if you did not receive the link.

Personal Care

I realize that some people had questions on basic necessities that I didn't address previously. After I moved to the second hotel, I had easy access to grocery stores where I could buy what I needed. If you are not staying near a store or are unsure of your accommodations, I recommend bringing your own trial-size products until you can find a local store. If you're going to be out in the bush or somewhere remote, you might want to bring enough of everything to last you your entire trip.

Mouthcare
I use bottled water to brush my teeth as a precaution. I pour the water in a small glass. I think I will actually use the same method when I return home, because I use a lot less water. I brought my own trial size toothpaste, but I bought a bigger size from the store here. They have brands that Americans will recognize - Colgate, Closeup, Pepsodent. BYO only if you require special products.

Bathing
No different than home, except my first hotel only had a shower. Indians prefer showers or running water to sitting in a tub of still water. You can find a variety of soaps, bar and liquid, in the store. BYO only if you have sensitive skin that requires special products.

Hair care/skin care
There are a variety of shampoos in the grocery store, but very few conditioners. They carry brands like Dove, Garnier, Pantene, etc., as well as ayuverdic products. You won't find any Cream of Nature here. There are hair dyes, but mostly in dark brown or reddish tones. Some of the products guarantee healthy, shiny, black hair (the natural color for most Indian hair). If only those same companies helped maintain natural skin appearance also. Many of the skin care products focus on lightening skin for both men and women. BYO Recommended if you require special products.

Shaving
Gillette creams and razors are very popular here. I haven't really noticed the other brands. I've read that men should have an "Indian shave" at least once while here, but make sure the razor has been sterilized. For women, beauty parlors offer very cheap hair removal services. I recommend getting your eyebrows threaded at least once. BYO only if you require special products.

Feminine products
Stayfree and Kotex napkins are popular here, as well as a brand called Whisper that looks a lot like Always packaging. I saw a tiny section on a bottom shelf for O.B., which was the only brand of tampons. Based on what I've read, they are not widely used here. BYO Recommended

Eyecare
I've seen a tiny section for B&L contact solution in the grocery store. I've torn 2 contacts while here, and I hope I don't have to replace the other 2 before I leave. I've seen signs for optometrists while driving, but they all show glasses. I asked my co-workers if they wear contacts and no one in the group wears them. It is hard for me to believe that so few people wear contacts here. You can read about my contact solution story in an earlier post. BYO Required

Laundry
I used the hotel's laundry service for my jeans and work clothes, and I handwashed smaller items like underwaer and t-shirts. I bought a small package of Tide because it was a brand that I recognized, but there were many other options. BYO only if you require special products.

My Last Night in Mumbai

Last night was my last time in the Mumbai office. I asked the ladies to wear saris on my last day to take pictures. I wore the same sari, but I had a new blouse stitched. I also needed lessons on how to wrap myself before going home. I brought my sari to the office and Iffat gave me a lesson on how to wrap it. I was able to do it with her help, but I need more practice on my own. One of the ladies also painted my hand in mehinde (henna). Many people told me I was ready to be a bride in my sari and mehinde. I just need a groom. It took about 45 minutes for her to apply the henna, and an hour for it to dry. I slept with it on my arm so that the color would darken and scraped it away with coconut oil this morning. The designs will last for a couple of weeks.

The team had a celebration for me and gave me gifts, including beautiful diamond and pearl jewelry that could be worn with my sari, a hand-stitched bag, and a hand-painted tray. The picture on the tray was something I've been looking for the entire time I've been here. No one knew that but me and God. The finishing touch was a beautiful shawl from Kashmir that Jaya gave me. Previously, she'd told me about her trip there with her mother to visit her brother in the army. I knew that the trip to Kashmir meant a lot to her and for her to give me something so personal was very touching.

Normally, I would be at work right now, but I'm using my final night here to pack and do last minute stuff. I bought an extra bag to take back all the things I bought, and I have just enough room.

I'm ok

The itching and redness has subsided. My skin is back to normal. I don't think it was anything I ate, because I've been eating the same spices for the past 5 weeks with no issues other than diarrhea a couple of days. It could have been the laundry detergent because the rash only covered the parts of me that were in a t-shirt. However, all of my clothes were washed in the same detergent (Tide) and I didn't have any other reactions. Oh well. All that matters is that I'm better now.

I need to start packing for my trip tonight/tomorrow morning. I'm about to head out for lunch and then I'll come back and pack for my weekend trip.

I went to the doctor yesterday, and she said the itching and redness was probably due to an allergic reaction to something, but I'm not sure what. She prescribed calamine lotion and some alergy pills. The hospital was a lot better than I imagined. It looked fairly new and the facilities were clean and modern.

Yesterday, Sarika invited me to lunch at her home. Her mother made a delicious seafood meal and we watched a Hindi movie before leaving. Anita invited me to her home last Sunday before the baby shower, and she also cooked for me. Everyone has been so hospitable.

Today, someone finally spoke to me instead of just staring. I was walking in front of a mall when a Sikh turned to me and asked me which country I was from.

I'm going to Delhi this weekend, and I'll also visit Taj Mahal in Agra. I need to buy a new bag to take all the things I've bought here back home. I brought an empty suitcase, but I need more room.

Sari, Baby, Henna

All the ladies on our team wore saris on last Monday for Gudi Padava, or the New Year. It was the celebration for N. Indians, but each region seems to have their own date to commemorate the New Year. S. Indians and Bengalis celebrated the New Year on yesterday. I brought my sari to work with me on last Monday so the ladies could show me how to wear it. It took 3 of them to put the pins in the right place and make me look like a proper Indian woman. I was amazed that they were able to dress themselves at home with no help, because it seems like a very complex process to get the pleats and things looking just right. They told me that it comes with practice. After they wrapped me in the sari, we took pictures – first in the bathroom and then out on the terrace of the office building. The sun was setting and provided just enough light to show off the beautiful colors on the ladies. It felt like we were doing a photo shoot. Saris range in colors and designs, and come in many different fabrics, including cotton, silk, etc. with or without sequins, embroidery, and other embellishments. You can get a good sari for Rs 500 – 1000 (around 25 USD), but they become more expensive (Rs 10000 or more) if there is a lot of embroidery or special work, like for weddings. The sari is a long piece of cloth, probably around 3 yards that is wrapped around the woman’s body in different ways. They showed me about 4 different methods of wrapping the top usually based on the region. One size fits all. The sari is pretty comfortable to wear when sitting, but it can make walking challenging. It is very similar to wearing a ball gown like a wedding dress or debutante dress, because you have to kick the dress out while you walk to avoid stepping on it. You also have to remember to raise it up when walking up stairs so you won’t trip on it. (I forgot that a couple of times.) It can also be cumbersome if you choose to wear it so it drapes over your arm. Your arm will become tired of holding it up and you also have to worry about it slipping off when you move. Overall, I enjoyed the experience and look forward to another occasion where I can wear my sari. I felt like a princess.

I didn’t do much around the hotel last week. I was happy that I had options for food and entertainment between sleeping and working. However, I almost had a Naomi Campbell moment in a store. I ran out of contact solution, and I went to the mall to buy more. Contacts are not a popular option here. Each of the malls next to my hotel has a supermarket named “Food Bazaar”. Neither of them had solution, but I remembered seeing it somewhere in the mall previously. I saw the Health and Beauty Store that I swore I wouldn’t go back to after they followed me around the last time and I practically ran out so I could breathe. I was desperate, so I gave it a shot anyway. The store is around 200 square feet with 3 small bisecting aisles. It is tiny and crammed with all kinds of cosmetics, fragrances, and personal products that you would find at your local Walgreen’s. Every 3 feet, someone stopped to ask me if wanted to try whatever was in their tiny section. That store was way too small to have that many people working there. They should have had no more than 3 employees in the store at one time. The solution was on the back wall. I was standing in the middle of that aisle with 3 sales people on each side of me. I wanted to scream. I proceeded to the counter to pay for it, and the guy told me it was Rs 145. The sign said 90. I walked back over to that aisle with my entourage and showed him the price. He said that was the old amount. Can you say price gauging? If I didn’t need the solution so badly, and if I had another option nearby, I would have walked out and never returned. But, he had me.

My co-worker, Sushuma (pronounced Sooshma), invited me to her baby shower on Sunday. I was excited to participate in traditional festivities. Anita told me a little bit about what to expect at an Indian shower. There are some distinct differences between Indian and American baby showers. First of all, the shower is to celebrate the mother-to-be only. People do not give gifts for the baby. Instead, the mother is showered with money, food, clothing, and other gifts. People do not give gifts for the baby until after he/she is born. The second difference is that there are no silly games. The focus is totally on the mother. We arrived at the apartment where the shower was held, and there were already a few older women sitting on the floor. More and more women arrived as the party went on. Sushuma sat on a decorated swing with a small table in front of her. Each guest blessed her by putting a red dot on her forehead, pouring rice and coconuts in her lap, feeding her a bit of a sweet, and giving her whatever gift they brought. First, her mother-in-law and her mother did special blessings with a candle. Next, other elders did something similar. Then, younger married women blessed her, followed by unmarried younger women. Those who came in late took their turns also. After all the women had blessed her, some of the older women started singing songs to her. It was a very nice affair. However, we heard the incessant sound of Fur Elise during the whole ceremony. The door to the apartment was open, and every time someone opened the gate to the elevator, the song would play. Everyone else seemed to ignore it. After all the blessings and songs, we proceeded downstairs where there was a tent setup on the patio. Both men and women partook in the reception. The food (veg) was good and it was a really nice night. We took a few more pictures with Sushuma before leaving.

Yesterday, I took a rickshaw to a street close to my hotel with several markets and shops. I could have walked, but it was too hot for that. I wore a hat, but people still seemed to stare at me. I saw a few items I wanted to buy for my nephews, but they cost just as much (or more) than adult clothes. Since that was my first time shopping for children’s clothes alone, I thought I should wait until I could talk to Anita or Sarika about how much they should cost. Later, Anita told me they were priced correctly, and that the stores charge more to make clothing for children because they have to cut the material smaller, or so they say. I went to another shop with reasonably priced dress material for women. They had their own tailor that could make the pieces for you. Tailors are very common here. I chose some material that I liked, but I wanted it made into western-styled summer dresses, not a salwar kameez. The material for a salwar kameez comes in 2 pieces with different patterns. One piece is used for the top and the other is used for the pants. There is a scarf too. It cost about $7 more for me to have 2 dresses made from the material. The owner and his wife were very friendly. She asked me if I was South African even though my hair was covered. I told her I was an American here for business. She had a salon above the store and asked me if I wanted to go up for any services. I asked her how much she charged for henna. I’ve been considering henna for my hair for a while, but I just hadn’t gotten around to doing it. I knew that I had to do it while in India, since it’s so common here. Henna is a natural dye that is used on hair and also to temporarily tattoo skin (also called mehinde). The natural color of henna is reddish, but it can be modified with other ingredients to produce brown tones or black. It has conditioning properties that strengthen the hair also. The lady applied the henna, and an hour later, my hair had a red tint very similar to the color I dyed my hair a few years ago. I was very pleased with the color, but they did not know how to wash my hair. LOL

I didn't think I would need to use my International SOS card for medical emergencies, but I had to make that call a few minutes ago. I've developed a rash all over my torso, back, and neck. While I was at work tonight, I kept scratching my back thinking that mosquito bites were making me itch. I looked in the mirror when I got to the hotel and saw red patches all over my upper body - not mosquito bites. I have no idea what caused it. SOS advised me to take some Benadryl, which I brought in my emergency medical kit, and they are going to schedule an appointment for me tomorrow with an English-speaking doctor. We'll see what happens. I just want to stop itching.

On Saturday, our company had a party at a local hotel. Every 6 months the Mumbai office has a party to recognize exceptional performance. (Is this the same company I work for?) There is also a competition between each division that involves a skit and dance - Bollywood style. I arrived just as the performances began. They were mostly in Hindi and Anita gave me a brief synopsis at the end of each performance. I stood there and looked at the costumes and dance slightly dumbfounded since I didn’t know what else was happening. Some groups wore elaborate costumes. They announced the winner, and then the real party began. There was an open bar with both soft drinks and “hard” drinks. The music was very loud and eclectic. No slow songs – mostly popular Hindi film songs, regional songs, reggaeton, soca, rock, Shaikira (not sure of her genre). All of the music seemed to have the same basic beats. Everyone wanted to dance with me and teach me new moves. Anyone who has ever tried to teach me a dance knows how difficult that is. I grew tired and went in search of food. There was a large buffet with Indian specialties that I really enjoyed.

Later, Jaya asked me if I wanted to take a walk outside because it was very hot and smoky in the party room. The Vashi train station was across the street, and she showed me the terminal and the tracks. One of the trains stopped on the tracks before heading to the depot. We walked around one of the cars which was designated for women. Typically, the train has 9 cars. One of the cars is designated for the handicapped and three of the cars are specifically for women. Women can also ride in the male cars, but it is safer to ride in the women only car if she’s not with a man. A police officer travels in the cars with women to protect them. There are a lot of rules in place to “protect” females, such as no work after 10:30pm. After our excursion to the train station, I was ready to head back to my new hotel.

On Sunday, I met Sarika at the bowling alley at the mall with her friends. She and I went shopping for a sari later. Sunday was a holiday, and the people in the office planned to dress up on Monday – women in saris and men in kurtas. We went to a couple of shops before I found one that I wanted to purchase. I also had to buy a blouse and petticoat. The final touch was the bangles that are traditionally worn. Apparently, I’m a giant here, because I could not get my hand through any of the bangles. They pulled out the largest size and it still would not fit. I always thought my hands were normal and proportional to my body. I could wear the bracelets with elastic or openings, but I didn’t see any that I liked that would match my sari. Oh well.

I’ve adjusted to working at night. In fact, my body stays on that schedule even when I’m not working. I might get into bed around 11, but I don’t actually go to sleep until after 3am. Sometimes, I watch TV or surf the net until I get sleepy. I wake up earlier on Sundays if I have something to do, but I still go to sleep late. Last night, I started reading The Kite Runner when I got into bed. I put it down around 2am so I could sleep. I laid in the dark for a while trying to fall asleep, but it just wasn’t happening. I turned the light back on and continued reading until I finished the book around 6am. My company has a small library that allows employees to check out 1 book for 7 days. My next book is Midnight’s Children by Salman Rushdie, a local author who has won many awards worldwide. I am mostly reading books written by or about Indians, but The Kite Runner is about Afghanistan. Both The Namesake and The Kite Runner were made into major motion pictures. I enjoyed The Kite Runner immensely, not just because it was a good story, but it also made this region of the world seem more real to me. You always hear about Afghanistan, Pakistan, and India on the news and only think of it as someplace on the other side of the globe far from home. But those places are real and real people live there. Some of the people are old enough to remember when life was peaceful, but there is a whole generation (my generation) that has never known peace in their homeland. War, poverty, and turmoil are normal for them because they haven’t known anything else for nearly 30 years.

It is hard to be surrounded by so much poverty on a daily basis. These people are so poor that they relieve themselves on the side of the road because they have nowhere else to go. On my way to work, I see little boys squatting in the dirt with a bucket of water next to them for rinsing off when they are done. It is so common that people continue on their way and don’t even seem to pay attention. I can’t imagine my brother or nephews pooping for all the world to see them. On my way from work each morning, I see whole families sleeping on the sidewalks, on top of cars, and other unlikely places. Some of them have the luxury of sleeping on a piece of plywood supported by cinder blocks. I see shopkeepers sleeping in chairs in their stores and rickshaw drivers sleeping in the back of the rickshaws. An auto rickshaw is basically a scooter with training wheels and a frame that allows people to sit across the back. It is half the size of a compact car. How can grown men actually sleep back there? I wonder if the shopkeepers and the drivers sleep there to protect their livelihoods or is it because they don’t have anywhere else to go. It’s hard to see these things constantly without becoming desensitized to the plight of fellow humans.

I asked Anita and Yagnesh if the children I see on the streets in the lower castes will ever be able to leave that lifestyle or are they doomed to live a life of poverty like their parents forever. They confirmed what I feared. A small number of them are given the opportunity through education to escape, but the rags to riches tales are very few.

Halfway

It’s been 3 weeks since I arrived in India. Time has certainly flown by. The part of the experience I dislike so far has been all the time I spent inside my hotel room at The Park. There are no shops or restaurants nearby, only businesses and the police training facility. I am moving to Fortune Hotel (http://fortunehotels.in/) this weekend. It is a new 3-star hotel and The Park is 5-star. Who determines these categories? What exactly is the criterion? I liked what I saw at Fortune even if it is not 5-star. It is clean and modern, and there’s a bathtub too. The Park only has a shower probably because traditionally Indians prefer to clean themselves with running water as opposed to sitting in still water. The hotel is next to the 2 malls I visited previously and one of the malls has a grocery store that I can visit for food and other items. I now have the option to eat at the hotel or eat out in one of the nearby restaurants. A flea market is in walking distance. The hotel is also near Sarika and other people I know, so I won’t be in the middle of nowhere with no one close to me.

Interesting t-shirts: "Swastika...4000 years before a madman from Germany discovered it" and "This t-shirt was outsourced in India"


on top of the mountain


view from the ferry - Gateway of India and Taj Mahal Hotel and Tower



All of us in front of Elephanta Cave


Bleach on my feet at the "parlor"

A Day in Bombay

I just finished a very long day in the city of Bombay (Mumbai). My office and hotel are in Navi (New) Mumbai, and I haven’t ventured to Mumbai proper since I landed at the airport. Navi Mumbai is another city (not really a suburb) across the bridge from Mumbai.

I had a wake up call at 6:45 am. I got dressed and went downstairs for continental breakfast before my ride arrived. Sarika and Jitesh picked me up in front of the hotel at 8. They procured a car and driver for the day. We went to the Vashi train station to pick up everyone else. The ride from Navi Mumbai to Mumbai is a little over an hour. We drove through the city and they showed me various landmarks until we reached our first destination – a mosque. It’s a really famous mosque called Haji Ali Dargah. We had to take off our shoes before entering the mosque and they separated men from women. We took a few pictures outside of the part where you pray (not sure of what to call it), and then we started to walk back. The mosque was located in the middle of the Arabian Sea and we had to walk across a long causeway to reach it. The smell was horrendous in that area. I tried to hold my breath while walking, but I just couldn’t force myself to do it longer than a few seconds. I felt like I was walking through a land field. I gagged several times while walking over there. Every Feed the Children commercial I ever turned away from came stared me in the face today. A group of healthcare workers stood near the entrance to the causeway giving children polio vaccines. Those poor children and their parents presented a very ugly picture of the poverty that so many of us fail to acknowledge every day.

After visiting the mosque, we headed to Elephanta Island. Before catching the ferry to the island, we took several pictures in front of Taj Mahal Hotel. We also took pictures at The Gateway of India. This monument was built by the British to welcome King George V to the island. Ironically, the Gateway was the last site that the British used to leave the island after India won its independence. We proceeded to the ferry amidst the crowd and the “hawkers” along the path. Once on the ferry, we took pictures of the group and the various landmarks along the way. The ferry ride across the Arabian Sea was around 45 minutes. Another foreigner was sitting next to me. I overheard him on the phone and I knew he was American by his accent. I was a little excited to know there was another American aboard. I asked him where he was from when his call ended and he told me he was from Massachusetts. We struck up a conversation about our experience in India. He’s traveled around India for a couple of weeks. He left home over 2 months ago and has visited many countries. He’s leaving for Thailand and maybe China later this week. I was surprised to hear that his best experience was in Iran.

Elephanta Island has 8 caves that were carved in the 6th century by one of the Indian rulers.. The carvings represent various forms of Hindu deities. On the way inside the gate, my group hurriedly pushed me inside. They later told me it was because the price for tourists is higher than Indians. They’d told the guard that I was from Delhi to get me in at the lower price. The path to the caves was lined with vendors selling various goods. There were animals along the path such as the ubiquitous cow, and the equally present stray dogs. There were also monkeys in the trees. Scary monkeys. They have a reputation of snatching things from people as they walk up because they think they it might be food. They also hang out in the trees near the caves. One of them stole a bag of Lay’s from a member of our group.

We went to McDonald’s after visiting Elephanta Island. I don’t even eat at McDonald’s at home, but the rest of the group wanted to go there. I had the Chicken Maharajah Mac with fries. Basically, it was the Big Mac made with chicken, and the sauce tasted like a ginger-based, spicy paste. Victoria Terminus was across the street from the McDonald’s. I stopped to purchase a book for Rs 50 before heading inside the station. I bought a bootlegged version of The Namesake. I’ve bought books from street vendors before with no issues, but this time I had to look through 3 different books to find the best copy. It looked like someone got lazy while making the copies, so some of the pages were a little crooked. They also stapled the first few pages in the wrong order.

Victoria Terminus is the main train station and houses both local and regional trains. There are vendors everywhere. It’s very similar to Grand Central Station in NY. You can infer from the name who built the station. It seemed that most of the tourist sites and older building were built by the last group of people to rule India.

I started writing this blog last night when I returned to the hotel. I was so tired that I couldn’t finish writing about the rest of the day. Now, I am refreshed and ready to continue.

We went to Nehangir Art Gallery which was built by the Tata family. It showcases modern Indian art. There was one piece that really fascinated me. It wouldn’t mind having it in my home, but I probably wouldn’t be able to afford it. Down the street from the gallery was the Prince of Wales Museum, now called Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Museum. You will find that many of the streets and buildings have 2 names – one Indian and one British. We only had 30 minutes to see the museum before it closed. We did the “quick tour”. Jaya (a member of our group) studied history in college and spent a lot of time at this museum. She told me what was there and where, which made our visit more effective. I told her what I wanted to see and she took us there directly. She also gave background information on the museum and some of the pieces. She was a great tour guide, even though we had a limited amount of time. After the guards put us out of the museum at 6pm sharp, we walked back toward the vehicle. Rupali suggested that we go to Rhythm House Music Store, which was next to the parking lot. It was just like any other music store I’d seen, but there was a huge section for movie soundtracks. Bollywood produces over 1000 movies a year, and each of those movies also produces soundtracks that become just as popular as the movie. I bought Erykah’s newest CD (I’m listening to it as I type this) along with an instrumental Indian CD with 51 songs. I didn’t want a CD in Hindi that I couldn’t understand. I always read the lyrics of English songs too. I’m very careful about what I buy here. I don’t want anything representing a deity or some other image that I don’t believe in.

We drove back towards Marine Drive where the sun was going down over the water. We walked along the path to the end. There were lots of couples and families enjoying the cool breeze and the view. Across the street were several upscale apartment buildings. It was a very pretty site made better because you couldn’t see the dirty water of the sea in the dark. We also saw The Queen’s Necklace. At night, the lights surrounding the beach make a semi-circle that looks like a pearl necklace; hence, the name.

We drove for over an hour to Juhu Beach around 8pm. I nodded off for awhile when we were sitting in traffic. I was tired and hungry. I get very cranky when I’m hungry, so I thought it would be best for everyone if I stayed quiet and napped. When we finally arrived at the beach, which is across from the airport, it was crowded and fit the carnival-like atmosphere I’d heard about Chowpatty Beach (on the opposite side). There were vendors selling food, toys, and other trinkets while people and the ever-present stray dogs walked along the beach. Some of them ventured into the dark waves. The stars were very clear and bright. We headed toward a restaurant, but the wait was over an hour. We ended up at Tawaa, a restaurant that specializes in fire-grilled food. We had to wait a few minutes for a table. While waiting, the ladies went to the “washroom”. I walked in and was assaulted by the pungent smell. I walked out almost immediately. One of the guys suggested that we take a rickshaw to find another more suitable restroom. I declined and said I could wait. I’m glad I always carry hand sanitizer.

After dinner, the driver dropped me off at the hotel. The first thing I wanted to do was shower and get clean. I felt really grimy from all the pollution and sweating.

I had a good time visiting all the sites of the city. I appreciate Jitesh, Sarika, Alkesh, Jaya, Rupali, Prasanna, and Febin showing me around.

Yesterday, Sarika and Vinu picked me up from the hotel before work. We went to a small dosa restaurant that makes around 100 different types of dosas. After eating dosas, we climbed a mountain in the middle of the city. Vinu drove up and stopped at different points for me to take “snaps”. The city looked so serene from up there. We passed a lot of couples on the way up taking advantage of the scenery and the privacy. There was also a small village near the top of the mountain. We descended the mountain and drove through the city. Vinu was really good at slowing down for me to take pictures of the various sites. He was a great tour guide. We also stopped for coconut water. I wasn’t expecting to actually drink coconut water from a coconut. I assumed coconut water was a special drink concoction. In reality, the top of the coconut is cut off, a straw is inserted, and you have coconut water. It was good, but it wasn’t as sweet as I thought it would be. They told me the coconuts get sweeter as it gets hotter. Coconut water is fairly common in beach areas like Miami, Jamaica, etc.

It was nearing time to go to work, but we had to make another stop on the way. We went to the top of a hill where there was a church and several temples on the same street. The church was Catholic and they were having mass. Next to the church was a Hindu temple (for North Indians). We had to take our shoes off before going inside. I took some beautiful pictures of the sunset off the balcony of that temple. There was another North Indian temple next to it, and a South Indian temple was at the end of the road. I learned that the primary way to distinguish gods from the north and south was the color. The gods of the south are all black. They are black for the same reason that the Evans (Good Times) had a picture of black “Jesus”. People want to worship a god that looks like them.

When I went to work last night, everyone was making plans to take me out on Sunday. They asked me where I wanted to go in Mumbai, and I gave them a list. Before the end of the night, they had mapped out a route that would allow me to see the most places in the shortest amount of time and they told me to be prepared to walk a lot. There will be a group of ten of us going out on Sunday.

Today, I went to “the parlor” with Moumita and her friend. I had my eyebrows threaded along with a pedicure for less than $6. That was my first time ever using thread and it wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be. I think the lady was a little frustrated with me because I didn’t understand what she was telling me to do. Thankfully, Moumita was there and she translated for me. She wanted me to hold my eye taut. The pedicure was basically the same as one I would get in the US, except for one thing. The first thing the lady did was pour a powder into a bowl and mixed it with water. She applied the paste on my feet with a brush. At the time she was applying this paste, Moumita’s friend asked me if the pedicures were different in the US. I told her I’d never seen this white paste before. She told me it was bleach to lighten my feet. I wanted to jump out of the chair when she told me that. There is a great fascination with bleaching skin here that I find very disturbing. After leaving the parlor, we walked around for a bit. I saw an elephant walking down the street while waiting. The man riding him was asking people for money.

We waited for Anita to come get me. I’ve known Anita for two and a half years. She’s traveled to the US twice and we’ve developed a great friendship. She and her husband took me out to dinner. We had a good time at a place called Indulge that’s not too far from my hotel. They cleared up a couple of mysteries for me. 1) Everyone stares at me when I go out because of my hair. 2) After using the hose, you’re supposed to drip dry.

Your Questions

Some people have sent me emails with individual questions. I've responded to those emails, but I thought that other people might have the same questions. Feel free to post any questions you have about my experience in India in the Comments section of this post (Your Questions). I will answer your questions in this post only, so check back for updates. After I answer your question, you can always add more questions or follow-up on previous answers. Just click on Comments to pose a question. You can remain anonymous if you like, although I would like to know who is inquiring.

busy day

Today was one big adventure. I woke up around 6am and couldn't go back to sleep. I read a little bit before showering and going downstairs for breakfast. The hotel staff greeted me. "Good morning, Ms. Stephens." I like to sit by the window of the restaurant facing the pool, but that is the smoker's section. Thankfully, none of the smokers came down while I was eating my breakfast, so I ate in peace. (Aside: Why do smokers always get the good seats by the windows or the patio?) I was dressed and knew that I was going to do something other than stay in my room today, but I didn't know what that something was. I went back to my room and saw that it was still too early to call anyone. I waited a couple of hours before picking up my phone. Something was wrong with the phone and it wouldn't allow me to dial out. I had to use the phone in the room to call one of my co-workers. We were going to the mall, but she had to run a few errands before she could go. She asked if I wanted to join her and I accepted. I had to figure out how I would get to her place. She, like most Mumbaikers, does not drive. I'd asked the guy at the front desk if the hotel had a car for rent earlier in the day. He said it starts at Rs1200 for 2 hours and goes up from there. That was much too expensive. After talking to Moumita, I decided I would try a rickshaw. She gave me her address and I proceeded downstairs. I asked the front desk guy where I could catch the rickshaw and how much I should expect to pay. I went outside to the street and a rickshaw just happened to be coming my way. I told him where I was going ( I wrote the address on a slip of paper) and got in. On the way there, he stopped to ask one of his buddies exactly where it was. I arrived at my destination within 15 minutes. Moumita met me outside and we proceeded to her flat.


The apartment was small (appx 500 sq. ft.). Her roommate has a 2.5 year old named Advev aka Chucky. He was really shy and wouldn't talk to me at first. Then, he warmed up to me and we started playing together. He even shook my hand later in the rickshaw (it was a game to him), and he laid his head on my shoulder. His mother, Rashmi, told me that she's separated from her husband. It seems that it is becoming a trend in Mumbai for men to walk away from their families in a place where it was unthought of in the not so distant past. Divorce has a horrible stigma in Indian society. The woman and her family feels the brunt of it, and she is treated very badly for the rest of her life.


We went to the bank and grocery store. The store had three levels - groceries on 1, clothes on 2, and housewares on 3. It was a fairly inexpensive market. We went back to the flat for lunch. Rashmi cooked chicken curry South Indian style. We sat and talked for a while after lunch. I was invited to hang out with them again next weekend. The power went out for about 30 minutes and the apartment became a sweatbox. I hadn't heard Chucky speak a lick of English all day, but suddenly he started saying "electricity" over and over again. The power goes out twice a day in the city. I know that the power goes out at the hotel during the day, but it always comes back on a few seconds later. I suppose they have back-up generators at the hotel. I didn't realize it was happening all over the city. So many of us take it for granted that when we flip the switch we have light and air. Local residents also have to boil their water to remove impurities.


I had to use the loo before leaving for the mall. I walked in and immediately walked back out. I
needed instructions on how to use the toilet! I'd read about the Indian-style toilet, but I really wasn't expecting to ever use it. The hotel has modern Western facilities, and the office combines both styles. They don't use tissue, but a hose to rinse themselves. See the picture.


Later, we went to the flea market in a rickshaw. There were lots of people and dogs perusing the open market. Across the street from the market, hawkers had their wares on the sidwalks. We left the flea market and headed to the mall. Two malls were literally feet away from each other. The malls were bigger than the one I visited last week. One of them looked like it was plucked from LA and transplanted to Mumbai. All around were name-brand stores like Reebok, Wrangler, United Colors of Benetton, etc.



All day long, I was the main attraction. I don't like being the center of attention for everyone. I don't know what it was about me that made everyone stop and stare. I wore jeans and a t-shirt, which is not uncommon; especially not in the mall with all the Western stores. (I was surprised to see a couple of women with spaghetti straps.) Was it my skin? Half of the people around me, including Rashmi, were my complexion or darker. Maybe it was my hair. It is currently twisted, and I pinned the back up in a bun. At first , the attention was subtle, and I didn't mind it so much. There were a lot of double takes. People saw me and then had to look again to be sure they saw what they thought they saw. A couple of people in the grocery casually tapped their friends to tell them to look at me. One little girl gave me a really mean look, but I saw her do that to other people and realized she was probally just a mean little girl. When we walked around the flea market, people stared at me. There was a lady walking directly behind me. I think she was studying my hair. Every time I turned around, she was grinning at the back of my head almost tripping over me. At the malls, I was profiled. Store clerks stayed 2 feet behind me at all times. In one department store, 4 of the clerks crowded around the rack I was looking at and looked away when I looked up at them. Later, a woman snapped a picture of me with her camera phone on the escalator. I was trying my best not to be the stereotypical ABW, but I was getting annoyed. We went to the food court on the top floor. Rashmi and I split up to get our items. As I walked down the corridor, a woman did a total 360 when she saw me. She was facing me as I walked toward her and she turned her body completely around when I passed her. I turned back and looked at her, and she hurriedly looked away. I was so ready to get out of there. I didn't tell my shopping companions what was happening. The next time I go out in public, I'll wear a salwar kameez and cover my hair. I would like to see if that makes a difference in their reactions to me.



Rashmi and I left the mall together and took a rickshaw. Her flat is on the way to my hotel, so the driver dropped her off and continued on. I arrived at the hotel with just enough time to tune into Easter Sunday service online at my church. I logged in and was unable to view it. I tried another ministry and was unable to view it also. I was very disappointed. Last night, I wanted to watch Netflix movies online, but they are only available in the US. I thought Streaming Faith was available worldwide, but I guess not. UGH. After that disappointment, I was hungry, so I ordered room service. All I wanted was a sandwich and fries, no sauce/gravy or exotic spices. I had a good dinner and talked to an old friend online for a while.



Today was a very full day.

"The loo"

The malls look connected they are so close.

apartment building