Worth it

January 2024

I love when I can exploit a long layover. I had a 14 hour layover in Taipei, and of course I left the airport. After I checked in at my Airbnb, I asked the host for a dinner recommendation. He suggested the night market, and there I went. I was a little frustrated at first because I couldn't figure out what was not meat since I couldn't talk at the stalls due to the language barrier and they only took cash. Google Translate was my best friend. Once I found an ATM, I let my senses lead me, and I picked up so many delicious snacks. I found a table and enjoyed trying all the new food before walking back to my room.

Not pictured: watermelon juice, salt pepper and seaweed churros, and baked tofu

Shrimp in quail eggs

Stinky tofu with fried egg

Veggie crepe

Night market

Salt pepper and seaweed churro

Back to the beginning

I was born and raised in Dallas, TX. When it was time to pick a college, I wanted to go as far away as I could. Not because home was bad. I just wanted to spread my wings and see what else was out there for me beyond the familiar. I chose to attend Florida A&M University. I interned in Clear Lake (Houston), Detroit, and Manhattan while at FAMU. I finally saw real snow on a student ski trip in West Virginia, and I explored other cities near Tallahassee on weekend trips and football classics. I graduated with my MBA and landed a job in Houston.

I knew I would eventually return home, and that time has come. After living through nearly 25 hurricane seasons, I'm done. I'm moving back to Big D. People always ask me which city is better - Houston or Dallas. My response is always, "I can't compare because I've never lived in Dallas as an adult. "  (Give me a couple of years to adjust, and I'll give a better response.) Even though my foundation was in Dallas, I truly became an adult in Houston. I bought new, adult furniture (everything was used or plastic before). I bought a house. I bought and sold cars. I loved and experienced heartbreak in Houston. I used my passport for the 1st of many international trips from Houston. I began my professional career, networked, and led organizations in Houston. I unexpectedly became a dog mom in Houston. I became a runner in Houston.  I began my motherhood journey in Houston. I formed my chosen family. I found a home at The Harvest. I created a life in Houston.

I moved a lot when I was younger, and I've been in my current house for 16 years. It's my first time living in a place for so long. I can't say that I'm excited about moving. I just know it's time. I'm moving to be closer to my parents. I know that I'm doing the right thing for the right reasons. However, it has been challenging both physically and emotionally.

I'm selling my house and looking for a new house. I will keep my current job and work from the Dallas office. I have to find new doctors for me and my dog, new favorite restaurants, a church, my tribe, etc. 

I'm starting a brand new chapter. Every adventure and every experience has prepared me to be successful in this moment.

Where have you been?

I recently saw a story about a 79-year old woman who visited all 193 UN member states.  That's a great feat for her, which should be celebrated.  I don't have that goal.  I just want to continue exploring the world my way.  So far, I've visited 30 countries outside the US.

 I plan to update my country map with each new location that I visit.

My heritage

I will go home to my father... 

Luke 15:18 NLT

For years, I have written about my trips around the world, from Australia to India to South Africa to Peru to Iceland.  I've been blessed to visit approximately 30 countries on 6 continents, and I have more to see.  However, before I ever visited those countries, I visited "the country".  My first trips were not to a glamorous, magazine-worthy destination.  My early travel consisted of road trips to see my father's family in the woods of northern Louisiana.  

Today, I traveled down a road that took me back to the beginning.  Not just my beginning, but the beginning of my father's family (that we can trace).  

How did I get back to the beginning?  We held our family reunion this weekend where I met and reconnected with my family.  We talked about how we were related and I heard new names and new stories.  I had the privilege of serving on the planning committee, and we worked hard to make it a fun event for the young and old.  We welcomed everyone on Friday night with fun and games.  The weekend continued with a picnic and talent show on Saturday.  The final event was worship service today at the family church where my grandfather and other elders served over the years.  My family members were acknowledged not just during the service, but my ancestors were also silently honored on the pews where we sat.  The pastor spoke from Luke 15:17-18 with a message about the wasteful son who returned home.  Our family came home this weekend.  

 

My favorite part of this weekend happened after church when all of the official reunion events were over and everyone had said goodbye.  My dad told me he was going to the cemetery down the road to visit his parents' grave, and I hopped in the car with him.  That old cemetery contains the graves of not just my grandparents.  It is also the resting place of many other relatives, including cousins, aunts, uncles, great-grandparents, and more.  As we walked, my dad told me about some of the names he recognized, and I shared what I knew based on my research of the family tree.  The people buried in that cemetery lived. They loved.  They lost.  They learned.  They laid the foundations for family, community, homes, and churches with their labor, their prayers, and their capital.  

After we left the cemetery, we drove down the unpaved road to my family's property.  There were no signs or established markers, but my dad knew the way instinctively.  He told me he used to run through those woods barefooted as a kid.  He pointed out different places along the way where landmarks used to be.  I vaguely remembered the road from when I visited my grandparents as a kid.  It's probably been about 20 years since I've been on our land.  When we arrived at the end of the road, I was both amazed and aggrieved.  As we drove through the rough terrain I thought about all the memories that were made there.  Those hills watched our family grow for many generations, and now they were empty.  All of the previous occupants had either died or moved to the big city.  I was sad when we arrived at the end of our road today, because a new road was there cutting through our property.  Where my grandparents' home previously stood is now Interstate 49.  I already knew the highway was there, but it felt heavy seeing it up close.  If it's hard for me, I can't imagine how difficult it must be for my father. 

 

The house stood at the top of this hill before it was demolished for I49.

There's something about going back and looking at the past that recharges the future.  It's like my ancestors are shouting words of encouragement.  They are reminding me to honor the past by continuing their legacy.  They are encouraging me to remind the family of who we are and where we've been.  I am also encouraged to live my life fully in the present in order to continue building on the foundation laid for me.

I honor Sam, Gail, Ethel, Joe, Lily, Eliza, Jerelyn, Dock, Mattie, Granville, Earl, James, Eula, Mae, Mildred, Elijah, Easter, Adeline, John, Joe, Willie Mae, and so many others.  These are my people. I'm standing on their shoulders.  I carry them with me when I walk on distant lands.  They are with me when I cross oceans.  I am here because of the sacrifices that they made.  This is my heritage.

Lights, camera, action?

I added the Northern/Southern Lights to my travel bucket list about 2-3 years ago. The Northern Lights (Aurora Borealis) can be seen in Norway, Greenland, Iceland, Swedish and Finnish Lapland, Scotland, Siberia, Canada and Alaska. The Southern Lights (Aurora Australis) are seen in Antarctica, Chile, Argentina, South Africa, New Zealand and Australia. I didn't care about the location, as long as I could witness the naturally occurring phenomenon. In fact, I named my latest car, Aurora, because that's her Roman name and because I aspired to see the Aurora. I started scoping out my options, and found that there were more opportunities in the northern hemisphere versus the southern hemisphere, and they are most visible from late September to early spring. I wanted to plan a trip around my birthday in January, and I looked into various packages. Then, an angel, called Groupon, sent me an alert about a package to Iceland that included hotel, airfare, and the Northern Lights. Bonus: The trip would begin the day after my birthday. Of course, I jumped on that deal. Months later, my friend told me she was interested in going too, so I sent her the Groupon.  The price had increased, but it was still inexpensive.   

The time came for us to leave, and I was so excited. I packed for the cold weather and I researched how to capture the best images of the Aurora. We arrived in Reykjavik early Monday morning, and we were scheduled for the Northern Lights tour that evening at 8:30. The Customs Officer told us that they were at level orange, and expecting a big storm that day. Iceland has 3 weather alert levels - yellow, orange, and red. That wasn't a good sign, but I remained optimistic. After we checked in the hotel, the reception desk told us to check around 4 or 5pm to confirm that the tour was still happening. We did just that. On night 1, the tour was canceled due to the snow storm. Well, that was disappointing! The tour company included a disclaimer with the package, because we were subject to the elements, so we knew that they would reschedule the tour. 

The next day started with hope. Again, there were clouds that prevented us from going. We had 1 more night available before going home. I slept until almost noon. When I finally went downstairs, I saw a sign at the reception desk listing all the tour cancellations. Noooooooo! Not again! The receptionist told me there might be a small chance of seeing the lights at night near the hotel if I walked toward the bay away from the city lights. I went downstairs around 10:30 that night. The receptionist on duty recommended going to the highest floor of the hotel first to catch a glimpse before traipsing outside. I didn't see anything from the hotel, so I walked outside, crossed the street, and arrived at the path around the bay. I saw other people standing there searching for a break in the clouds just like me. I walked back to the hotel disappointed. Another tourist told me that she heard there might be an opportunity early in the morning between 4 and 6 am. I didn't want to leave Iceland without exhausting all possibilities, so I set my alarm for 5:30am. I woke up and dressed for the bitter cold again before walking upstairs. I walked on the outside stairs, and as I approached the 7th floor, my snow boots sank into the fresh snow. That wasn't a good sign. I arrived at the balcony and could barely see the street down below with the wild wind blowing thick white snow all around me.  I retreated downstairs and got back into bed. 

Next time, Aurora, next time...

Looking out over the bay

 

Between 2 Worlds

For the second time in my life, I stood at the intersection of two continents.  The first time was in 2016 when I visited Istanbul, Turkey where Europe and Asia meet.  Most recently though I was on the tectonic plates that divide North America and Europe at Pingvellir in Reykjavik, Iceland.  Iceland is full of natural wonders.  I saw an amazing waterfall, called Gullfoss.  It was such a majestic site covered in ice and snow with a thunderous waterfall roaring through the valley. 

Pingvellir

Pingvellir

Gullfoss

Gullfoss

My next adventure

I created this blog in 2008, because I wanted to document my first experience in India. Over the years I have shared many (not all) of my adventures. I've traveled domestically and internationally, with friends and alone. I've taken trains, planes, automobiles, boats, and bikes across 6 continents. I've walked and ran many miles on those continents too. I've eaten amazing food from home kitchens and local restaurants. I've done some things I didn't think I would do, like zip lining, jumping off a cliff, bathing an elephant, riding a camel, and vacationing nude. 

My latest/next adventure is the biggest thing I've ever done. This adventure changes my life completely. I am preparing to be a mother. Of course, I am documenting this new journey too. I believe that everything that I experienced before will help me be the best mother I can be. To read more about my new adventure, follow the blog, That Mother Lode.

Love in the time of Covid

In the summer of 2019, I decided that I was going to visit Machu Picchu in 2020. I started looking at flights and various tours. In the midst of my searching, I received an email from Living in the Light about a retreat in Peru in March of 2020. I would be able to enjoy a wellness retreat, visit Machu Picchu, and see Lima within the same trip. I immediately decided that once again the retreat came at the perfect time for me.  I wouldn't have to plan anything other than my flights, so this was a win. I made the reservations and I was ready to go. My flight was scheduled to depart for Peru on March 13, 2020. However, I received a cancellation email from United Airlines on March 12. After that weekend, the world as we knew it came to a stop due to the Covid-19 global pandemic. In the spring of 2020, we foolishly thought things would be normal again by the fall. The retreat was rescheduled for August 2020, then March 2021.

In the meantime, all international travel was on hold. My last international flight was to Mexico for my birthday in January 2020. I flew to Chicago for a funeral in June. I remained grounded after that, but I didn't stop exploring. I embarked upon road trips around Texas, and had a good time visiting new places and revisiting others with great companions.

During 2020 and the first half of 2021, I experienced loss, as did the rest of the world. Life changed dramatically.  The world that I knew changed.  We lost my mom's 2 surviving sisters - Aunt Mae, my rock, and Aunt Mil, my great tree - as well as other loved ones. There was a lot of grief and pain. However, what I felt most was love. Love from my family and friends, love from God through grace, and love for myself. I knew things would be better.

The Living in the Light retreat was rescheduled to August 2021. Before leaving home for the airport in Houston, I paused to think about what I wanted to take with me to this sacred space built by the Incas, and my eyes landed on Aunt Mil's tam. It was easy to carry and fit easily into my already full bag. "Auntie's beautiful, cute, educated, pretty, sweet, little traveling niece" finally visited Machu Picchu and took a symbol of the giants who built the platform for me to stand. While there, I carried with me the love and light that I received, and I radiated joy. It wasn't because of the location though. It was inside of me all along and I only had to recognize it like Dorothy.

Sun Gate that the sun illuminates only during the solstice

Frequently Asked Questions for "Operation Let Go"

I fulfilled my dream of traveling around the world in 2018. After returning home, I was asked the following questions by many (many) people.

Where did you go? How long did you stay in each place?

Thailand (1 month) - Chiang Mai, Pai, Bangkok, Krabi/Ao Nang

Singapore (1 week)

Malaysia (2 weeks) - Kuala Lampur

Indonesia (1 month) - Lombok, Gili Trawagan

India (1.5 month) - Delhi, Jaipur, Ft. Cochin (Kerala), Mumbai, Nashik

United Arab Emirates (UAE)  (1 week) - Dubai, Abu Dhabi

South Africa  (2.5 weeks) - Johannesburg, Pretoria, Cape Town, Port Elizabeth

Ethiopia (7 hours) - Addis Ababa (long layover)

Egypt (5 days) - Cairo, Alexandria, Memphis, Giza

Netherlands  ( 24 hours) - Amsterdam (overnight layover)

The length of time was based on visa restrictions, things to do/see, and whether I wanted to stay longer before moving to the next location.

How long were you gone?

July 2018 to December 2018

Are you back back?

For now...

Did you travel alone?

I was alone most of the time. I'm an introvert, so being alone wasn't a big deal for me.  I made an effort to connect throughout my journey by going to Toastmasters meetings and joining black expat groups in various countries.  I also met people when I took group tours. Talking to other people sometimes helped me figure out where I wanted to go next. My boyfriend came to visit me in 3 cities too. 

Did you run out of money?

No, I did really well with my budget and was still able to do everything I wanted.

Did you have a lot of luggage or did you backpack? How did you know what to take?

I took a backpack and a small carry-on bag. I also used a small day bag for my daily adventures that usually included water, poncho/umbrella, snacks, battery pack, and a sarong. I researched female packing lists on Pinterest to help me get started and made adjustments as needed. My motto when it comes to luggage is, "Don't you carry nothing that might be a load." I need to be able to handle all my luggage by myself, which could include walking up and down steps or running through the airport.  See my packing list here.

What was your favorite place?

I liked them all for different reasons and wouldn't mind revisiting a few places. I can see myself living in Chiang Mai and Johannesburg.

What was your favorite moment?

I had lots of favorites. My most fulfilling moments happened while volunteering in Indonesia and visiting Ubuntu Centre in Port Elizabeth.

Would you do it again? 

Yes!

Why did you travel around the world by yourself? 

I took the journey because I dreamed about it for years. I finally decided that there was no time like the present, and I needed to do it while I could. I did it alone because I wasn't going to wait until other people could save money, retire, get married/divorced, send the kids off to college, etc. It was a solo journey because that worked best for me. 

Were you scared?

Yes. The scariest part was buying a one-way ticket and not knowing where I would end up. Also, the Indian trains were a formidable foe.  In general, my safety plan included the following:

• Buying travel insurance (My personal belief is to always have insurance if it will cost more than $400 for me to get home. I don't leave home without it.)
• Having regular check-in calls, forwarding flights and room info. to my mom, telling my hosts about my plans for the day (someone always knew where to find me)
• State department country registration in case of evacuation
• Trying to blend in as much as possible, which was impossible everywhere, except for South Africa. Sometimes my foreignness was also protection, because everyone noticed me. Drivers stopped and stared when I crossed the street instead of flying through intersections. People were very helpful in many cases because they wanted to be good hosts to an obvious outsider.
• Using my American privilege when needed (hurting Westerners brings bad publicity to an area and can cripple tourism)
• Asking local friends and hosts to translate and/or make travel plans for me when needed
• Sharing Uber ride info., especially at night 
• Being always aware of my surroundings and knowing how to get back "home". I saved offline directions on my phone just in case there was no internet access and I also used local paper maps when available. I ducked into businesses or restrooms to reorient myself privately if I was lost.

Pack light

Here's an update on my packing list for Operation Let Go.

• One of the straps on my backpack was ripped apart when I landed in Krabi. Amazon gave me a refund, and I ordered a new one.
• My Fitbit charger broke when I pulled it out of my bag. I ordered a new one on Amazon after an unfruitful search in Bangkok.
• I ordered hiking boots after I arrived in Chiang Mai, but they were returned before I wore them.
• I was given 5-finger "Vibranium" shoes that replaced my running shoes, swim shoes, and hiking boots.  I only carried those shoes and flip flops.
• I needed safety equipment and camping supplies for my volunteer work in Indonesia. I added the following: safety glasses, work gloves, quick dry cargo pants, mosquito net, inflatable mattress pad, compact sleeping bag, and steel toe boots. It took some very creative packing to fit everything in my bags. I wore the boots in the airport so I wouldn't have to carry them. I walked like Herman Munster in those heavy boots.
• I mailed some souvenirs and clothes home while in Ft. Cochin and Mumbai to make room for other things I might find along the way.
• I bought another sarong. The versatility is amazing. It can be used as a towel, a bed cover, a headwrap, a dress/top, a covering for temples, a blanket, and more.
• compact towel

Returns

• FAMU hoodie that I only wore on planes, but it would have been nice to have it in South Africa
• Cotton yoga pants - too hot
• 2 Tank tops
• Extra underwear and socks - I only needed socks for my boots and on long flights. 
• Tankini - I wore my one-piece swimsuit if there was a swimming opportunity.

I am grateful for my boyfriend. He was my courier. I had Amazon packages delivered to him, and he would bring them to me when he visited. He also took all my unwanted/unnecessary items back home to lighten my load. Thank you, JaVar!