Monsoon Wedding

April 17, 2010

I woke up bright and early Saturday morning to accompany Auntie Bose to the market to purchase material and ready-made outfits to take home with me. She told me not to talk, just to point at what I wanted and she would negotiate the price. There were hawkers on the street selling foodstuff and toys while small shops held their doors open to display the goods inside. We did not stop at those shops because she said they were more expensive. Instead, we continued to walk until we came to a cramped alleyway barely large enough for 2 people to walk abreast comfortably. The small stalls only accommodated the seller and the patrons had to stand outside and point to what they wanted. The heat and stench were stifling even in the early morning hours. We stopped at a few stalls that sold beautifully dyed materials and clothing. She said that they still knew that I was a stranger and wouldn't go as low as she wanted. We didn't have time to keep trying to find lower prices, so we settled. We hurriedly bought what I wanted and started back to the house to get ready for the wedding.

The lady from the salon came to the house to tie the gele' this time. After dressing, the driver took Renny, the girls, and I to the church. Onome was already there because he was standing in the place of the father of the bride. There was another wedding also held at the church, and the attendants were just sitting down outside for the reception. When we walked to the entrance for our wedding, Mimi, Onome's oldest sister, was standing outside visibly upset. We learned that the heavy rain from the night before had pooled on the reception tent and caused it to collapse. They didn't know if it could be recovered before the reception.

After the Catholic mass, everyone walked to the front with an offering for the couple and was sprinkled with "holy water" before greeting the new bride and groom. Everyone was beautifully arrayed in their orange and brown geles and other regalia. We danced out of the church and stood on the church steps snapping pictures. We proceeded to the reception where everything with the tents had been rectified before the guests arrived. Upon arrival, two men in suits tried to prevent guests from entering even though there was no guest list for them to know who should be there. It was so chaotic. Renny pleaded that the grandchildren should be allowed inside and they reluctantly let us pass.

The tent was beautifully decorated with brown and orange draped across the posts and gold accents on the tables. There were subtle hints of the tent collapse, like grains of sand on the table cloth, but all else was just right. The wedding cake was a towering 4 layers of orange on a table up front. The friends of the parents danced in with them followed by the bride and groom escorted by their friends. They danced alone at the front and then the emcee told their friends to join them. After a song or two, he told the friends to sit down so the parents could dance. He said, "The friends will dance all night without spraying, but the parents and older people will spray the couple."

After the reception, we hung around while everyone else from the house went home. Someone finally told the bride and her mother what happened to the tent and showed them the video. Mrs. K. was speechless.

Traditionally, the bride goes back to her home for a final goodbye to her family before being welcomed to the groom's family. The reception was in Ikeja near the groom's (family) home, and it would take nearly an hour to go the bride's (family) home in Fair Stock. The MOB, aunts, sisters, and cousins gathered in a small circle under the tent and sang songs in Yoruba and English, then prayed for Anne in her new life. She had changed from her wedding dress to a pink gown and knelt before her elders as they prayed. Onome prayed as the male head of the family. Osaze's family sent a car to pick up Anne and we followed behind them to the house. Her mother did not follow and the father also would have gone home, but Onome chose to just be the big brother for this part of the ceremony. Her new family welcomed her to the family with songs. They offered drinks to the guests. We prayed and went on our way after about 30 minutes.

The day was full of joy and excitement, and I'm glad I was able to be part of it all. I started packing for my long journey home the following day. There was a prayer of thanksgiving to be held at the church on Sunday for the final act of the wedding, but I would not attend due to my flight.