Stay cool!

I am currently sitting at the Delhi train station waiting on a train to Jaipur that is running 45 minutes late. I could deal with the tardiness, but sitting on display to the public is trying my patience. I feel like I'm an animal with 3 heads and green hair the way that people blatantly stare at me here. Men, women, and children are so focused on me that they sometimes run into other people or drop their belongings. I sat down on an empty bench when I learned about the delay. A few minutes later, a group of about 7 men sat across from me and only looked away when I returned their stares. When I turned away and looked back in their direction, they were staring again. An old woman sat on the bench next to me. She looked at me briefly and then turned away to mind her own business. When she left, a man sat down and proceeded to eyeball me until I returned the gesture. He glanced away. I started playing a game on my phone with my shoulders hunched, and I could feel him peering at me over my shoulder. I returned his stare again. For a brief moment, I thought about the benefits of a burqa.

I've only been in India for a week now, and I plan to stay until mid November (after Diwali).  My time in the country started off with me waiting at the airport for my boyfriend to arrive. My flight from Kuala Lumpur landed 2 hours before his flight. We left the airport around 3am. It was great having him here with me for my first few days back in India. We visited the Red Fort in Delhi, and the Agra Fort, Taj Mahal, and other points in Agra. We stood out everywhere we went. Some people followed us with their eyes while others actually walked behind us too closely. He thought it was just men being overtly sexual to a woman, and he wanted to go to blows with a few them to protect my honor. I told him it's not just the men and it's not necessarily a sexual thing. Both men and women ogled the both of us. We are aliens to them, and I guess their parents didn't teach them that staring at others is rude. A couple of people said they liked my hair, and he received compliments on his beard. Some wanted to take pictures with us like we were Barack and Michelle. We obliged schoolchildren and families who were polite and asked our permission. Otherwise, it felt like a zoo. (Indian streets provide animal smells free of charge.) It's also hard to determine when people are genuinely being nice and when they are conning you. We received "friendly" advice about local shops from a few different men that were most likely paid by the shopkeepers to send tourists there. Even though it was chaotic, I'm glad I was able to experience Delhi with my boyfriend at least for a few days. We travel well together.

It's hard for me not to be frustated here in India sometimes. The biggest issue happened just a couple of days ago. I stayed at Soul Stay Hostel ($4/night) for a few days after my boyfriend left. It seemed like a really cool place for a hostel. However, I came back from visiting the Lotus Temple and exploring the city to find by bags unzipped and money missing. I immediately reported the theft to the staff. They apologized and told me they would reimburse me and figure out what happened.  The next morning, I talked to one of the staff members named Jay about my travel plans and being reimbursed. He said he felt bad because he was on duty when it happened,  and he didn't want me to have a negative impression of the hostel. He said he would help me find a train ticket and a room for my trip to Jaipur paid by Soul Stay to make it up to me. I said I wasn't staying in another hostel, so he searched for a hotel room that met my approval. After I confirmed what I wanted, he said he would book everything for me and provide confirmation when I came back that evening. I was satisfied with this solution because it was close to the amount that was stolen. I left for the day and took the Metro train and a bus to the Lodhi Colony to view their public art. I met a young woman at the bus stop, named Rechna, who helped me navigate the bus. She was heading home to Lodhi and she showed me around the neighborhood until we arrived at her street. I wandered around on my own snapping pictures of murals on random buildings, such as the police station, apartments, and storefronts before heading back to my room hours later. Upon my return to the hostel, one of the managers told me they found the thief. Apparently, a guy's phone was stolen on the same day that my money went missing. They did some amateur detective work by calling the number and traced it back to none other than Jay, the one person who seemed to want to help resolve my problem. I told them about the arrangements he said he was making for me, and they said that he did get the train ticket through their agent, and that was all. The value of that ticket was a small fraction of what was stolen. I was not reimbursed. My room was not comped. I asked about it again when I checked out this morning. I also learned before checking out that other people also had money stolen while they were there. The missing money was important, because it was U.S. dollars that I wanted to exchange. However, the bigger problem for me was the invasion of my privacy and the lack of security. The hostel management could have taken better steps to remedy the situation, and they didn't. It's safe to say that I won't be staying at another hostel for awhile, if ever.

I'm holding on to my joy and will continue looking for the good in every situation.